Amateur Videos (Amherst)
College females interested in making amateur videos, respond with age and photo, myspace link, etc. For a private collection, no model release required
That is all.
PAYDAY LOAN DEBT RELIEF
2 weeks ago
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Crap Jobs Special Feature: St. Louis
Greetings from the gateway city! Thanks to the magic of the internet, we can job hunt in distant lands with the click on a button.
So I settled in for a nice long look at this fine city, searching for what everyone wants in a new location: a change of pace, something new, a hope for the future.
Okay, first observation: there are a LOT of jobs posted each day, way more than the Craigslist up north. However, when I looked more closely half of the jobs were obvious, obvious scams. "Make money by e-mails!", "Event coordinator- work from home!", "Administrative Assistant- 55-75K" etc.
Okay, strike one.
The first listing that caught my eye wasn't for a job, but by one of those courageous (read: desperate) individuals that has said "what the hell, I'm not getting anywhere looking for a job, might at well risk stalkers and identity theft and try to pimp myself out." Not a good sign.
Harvard/Columbia Educated Tutor -- All Ages, All Subjects (---------)
I am currently teaching at-risk children in the City schools, and recently taught in a college prep program. I taught writing at City College of New York, New York University and Webster University and have worked with advanced placement high school students in all subject areas.
SUBJECTS:
Language Arts (Composition, Reading Comprehension, Literature, Creative Writing)
Math (age appropriate; basic, geometry, algebra, algebra-trig) Science (biology, chemistry, physical anthropology, archaeology)
Foreign Language (French, German)
Social Science (government, politics, history, social/cultural anthropology).
SAT, ACT, GRE prep.
I have two books in print and enjoy working with all ages.
This is an important lesson for CJ seekers-- the ivy degree, rich daddy, or pedigreed work history will not necessarily insulate you from the crappiness! It can strike anyone, anywhere! The growing fear being, of course, that we are all really living in pre-revolutionary France. What else can explain it?
There's also a lot of part-time/150% commitment jobs. These are jobs that expect the moon, and want it to be procured in half (or less!) the time.
Applicant should have a background in medical front office and some back office skills. Good medical terminology, insurance verification, billing and AR experience, as well as, EKG’s, blood draws would be helpful. Applicant should be familiar with Microsoft Office, fax machines, printers, and copiers. Must be a warm, kind, and caring individual with good telephone etiquette; self starter with little guidance.
Sounds like they want someone serious...
This is PART-TIME and any applicant should be serious about part-time. Paid hours vary from 24 to 32 hours per week. Office hours are M, T, TH, F 9:00AM-3:00PM.
And the quest for full-time employment continues.
So when you filter out the scams, the part-time, and the beg-for-a-job posts, what do you end up with?
Short Film Needing Bird (St. Louis)
I am shooting my senior thesis film at Webster University and my story involves a character finding a hurt bird or a baby bird when he is out for a stroll. I am looking to do this in a humane fashion and I am looking for anyone who might be able to help with this who might have a bird or know someone who does that we could use for the film. It would need to be outdoors and would need to be able to be handled a little bit. Or if anyone has baby birds that we could get a few shots of in a nest on set with the actors.
I have a small budget, so I could pay a little for compensation for the day. My shoot dates are ------, but I would only need the bird for one day. If you have a bird or have any leads or ideas on how I could do this, please contact me at:
I guess St. Louis is out.
So I settled in for a nice long look at this fine city, searching for what everyone wants in a new location: a change of pace, something new, a hope for the future.
Okay, first observation: there are a LOT of jobs posted each day, way more than the Craigslist up north. However, when I looked more closely half of the jobs were obvious, obvious scams. "Make money by e-mails!", "Event coordinator- work from home!", "Administrative Assistant- 55-75K" etc.
Okay, strike one.
The first listing that caught my eye wasn't for a job, but by one of those courageous (read: desperate) individuals that has said "what the hell, I'm not getting anywhere looking for a job, might at well risk stalkers and identity theft and try to pimp myself out." Not a good sign.
Harvard/Columbia Educated Tutor -- All Ages, All Subjects (---------)
I am currently teaching at-risk children in the City schools, and recently taught in a college prep program. I taught writing at City College of New York, New York University and Webster University and have worked with advanced placement high school students in all subject areas.
SUBJECTS:
Language Arts (Composition, Reading Comprehension, Literature, Creative Writing)
Math (age appropriate; basic, geometry, algebra, algebra-trig) Science (biology, chemistry, physical anthropology, archaeology)
Foreign Language (French, German)
Social Science (government, politics, history, social/cultural anthropology).
SAT, ACT, GRE prep.
I have two books in print and enjoy working with all ages.
This is an important lesson for CJ seekers-- the ivy degree, rich daddy, or pedigreed work history will not necessarily insulate you from the crappiness! It can strike anyone, anywhere! The growing fear being, of course, that we are all really living in pre-revolutionary France. What else can explain it?
There's also a lot of part-time/150% commitment jobs. These are jobs that expect the moon, and want it to be procured in half (or less!) the time.
Applicant should have a background in medical front office and some back office skills. Good medical terminology, insurance verification, billing and AR experience, as well as, EKG’s, blood draws would be helpful. Applicant should be familiar with Microsoft Office, fax machines, printers, and copiers. Must be a warm, kind, and caring individual with good telephone etiquette; self starter with little guidance.
Sounds like they want someone serious...
This is PART-TIME and any applicant should be serious about part-time. Paid hours vary from 24 to 32 hours per week. Office hours are M, T, TH, F 9:00AM-3:00PM.
And the quest for full-time employment continues.
So when you filter out the scams, the part-time, and the beg-for-a-job posts, what do you end up with?
Short Film Needing Bird (St. Louis)
I am shooting my senior thesis film at Webster University and my story involves a character finding a hurt bird or a baby bird when he is out for a stroll. I am looking to do this in a humane fashion and I am looking for anyone who might be able to help with this who might have a bird or know someone who does that we could use for the film. It would need to be outdoors and would need to be able to be handled a little bit. Or if anyone has baby birds that we could get a few shots of in a nest on set with the actors.
I have a small budget, so I could pay a little for compensation for the day. My shoot dates are ------, but I would only need the bird for one day. If you have a bird or have any leads or ideas on how I could do this, please contact me at:
I guess St. Louis is out.
Monday, March 30, 2009
A FARM Internship? Seriously?
Never say never, people. The internship thing has the staying power of a bad penny. Apparently, especially in this economy.
Apprenticeships/Internships at -------- Farm in ---------, MA.
...We need help April through November. There is a potential opportunity for year round work.
See, they said WORK! W-O-R-K means it's a J-O-B! Unless they can somehow claim they're teaching you something...then you'd almost owe them. Hmm, let's see if they can pull this one off:
Apprentices will learn all aspects of farm life from using the biodynamic preps, to making compost, from seed to harvest and putting the fields to bed, to daily chores with our livestock.
The dreaded "L" word-- surely they don't have to pay you if you've learned something (anything!)
Also: I'm sure you'll "learn" lots about making compost!
You will also learn about and participate in sales and marketing of all our farm products at our CSA distributions, farm store and farmers markets.
Why it's practically a marketing internship. Other employers will definitely consider a farm stand "marketing" experience. Suuuure.
We provide room and board, internet access, workers comp insurance and $500 per month stipend.
This is indentured servitude. Yup, that's what it is. Internet access is not a salary!
We are located in the Berkshires with great kayaking, canoeing, biking and hiking just out our side door as well as nearby Tanglewood, Jacob’s Pillow, Mass MOCA, Clark Art Inst, Shakespeare & Co. and many more Art and Cultural attractions.
But we're near some fun shit (that you can't afford!)
Apprenticeships/Internships at -------- Farm in ---------, MA.
...We need help April through November. There is a potential opportunity for year round work.
See, they said WORK! W-O-R-K means it's a J-O-B! Unless they can somehow claim they're teaching you something...then you'd almost owe them. Hmm, let's see if they can pull this one off:
Apprentices will learn all aspects of farm life from using the biodynamic preps, to making compost, from seed to harvest and putting the fields to bed, to daily chores with our livestock.
The dreaded "L" word-- surely they don't have to pay you if you've learned something (anything!)
Also: I'm sure you'll "learn" lots about making compost!
You will also learn about and participate in sales and marketing of all our farm products at our CSA distributions, farm store and farmers markets.
Why it's practically a marketing internship. Other employers will definitely consider a farm stand "marketing" experience. Suuuure.
We provide room and board, internet access, workers comp insurance and $500 per month stipend.
This is indentured servitude. Yup, that's what it is. Internet access is not a salary!
We are located in the Berkshires with great kayaking, canoeing, biking and hiking just out our side door as well as nearby Tanglewood, Jacob’s Pillow, Mass MOCA, Clark Art Inst, Shakespeare & Co. and many more Art and Cultural attractions.
But we're near some fun shit (that you can't afford!)
Monday, March 23, 2009
Selling
Okay, the economy's bad. Let's simplify this: it's either a buyer or a seller's market. Right now, it's a "buyer's" (employer's) market, because so many "sellers" (desperate, desperate people) are out on the street looking for jobs. Employers are jumping for joy due to the masses of resumes from overqualified applicants with lowered expectations, right? Nope, they get picky.
Let's take this waitressing/waitering job posting. Decent restaurant, not five star or anything.
Experienced waitstaff needed for well established Italian Restaurant in Downtown Northampton.
Minimum 2 years service required. Must be available nights, weekends, and through the summer. Please apply in person Mon - Thur 2-4. -----.
Um, 2 years minimum for be considered for any old serving position? Even the during-the-week shitty shifts? Sheesh!
Okay, here's another one that seems more straightforward.
looking for highly motivated individual to work full time as a waitress/waiter in a small restaurant in Monson MA, applicant need to be hard worker and willing to work alone 2 or 3 days a week and with another team member for the end of the week and weekend.
This is already a rare bird-- actual details on the day to day activities of the job? This employer must be a relic from the past-- nowadays all practical information is treated like the biggest corporate trade secret of all time. No reasoning allowed on the part of the applicant, just slide your resume under the door! We'll call you (if we want to).
Send credentials and work history to be considered for the job. Thanks
There's something in the tone here that sets my hair on end. "Considered"- you know, so we can decide how worthy/less you are. Can you feel the judgment? Can you sense the annoyance at "unqualified" applicants? Credentials? Really?
Why all the fuss? What is this, the VP search? How many resumes will they want to collect? How many hopes will get raised and dashed? Couldn't they just hire the first person who looks like they can handle it and save everyone time and energy?
But it's a buyer's market. And everyone wants to sell.
Let's take this waitressing/waitering job posting. Decent restaurant, not five star or anything.
Experienced waitstaff needed for well established Italian Restaurant in Downtown Northampton.
Minimum 2 years service required. Must be available nights, weekends, and through the summer. Please apply in person Mon - Thur 2-4. -----.
Um, 2 years minimum for be considered for any old serving position? Even the during-the-week shitty shifts? Sheesh!
Okay, here's another one that seems more straightforward.
looking for highly motivated individual to work full time as a waitress/waiter in a small restaurant in Monson MA, applicant need to be hard worker and willing to work alone 2 or 3 days a week and with another team member for the end of the week and weekend.
This is already a rare bird-- actual details on the day to day activities of the job? This employer must be a relic from the past-- nowadays all practical information is treated like the biggest corporate trade secret of all time. No reasoning allowed on the part of the applicant, just slide your resume under the door! We'll call you (if we want to).
Send credentials and work history to be considered for the job. Thanks
There's something in the tone here that sets my hair on end. "Considered"- you know, so we can decide how worthy/less you are. Can you feel the judgment? Can you sense the annoyance at "unqualified" applicants? Credentials? Really?
Why all the fuss? What is this, the VP search? How many resumes will they want to collect? How many hopes will get raised and dashed? Couldn't they just hire the first person who looks like they can handle it and save everyone time and energy?
But it's a buyer's market. And everyone wants to sell.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Jobs With and For Crazy People
Clubhouse Unit Coordinator
Hours are flexible...Work directly with and alongside adults with mental illness engaging them in various tasks and activities to build their skills and confidence, and prepare them for employment. Coordinate a unit of activity within the program working hands-on. Serve as site manager for assigned external job sites, including learning the job, providing on-the-job training and support, and working effectively with the employer to maintain the job site. Serve as a non-clinical advisor to a caseload of members...
This is another one of those nebulous "human services" agencies that seems to have a strong presence in the valley. I guess people here go crazy a lot. Is it pollution? The abundance of college campuses? The shitty job prospects?
Okay, let's say you're young. You're still idealistic, you still think you can make a difference. You're willing to take a tough job. But will they take you?
Prefer: Bachelor's degree in a related field with internship experience or 2 years of mental health experience
They've done it, they've put it out in the open. They want a candidate with internship experience. They demand that you have already whored yourself out for free-- AFTER getting a bachelors degree in the field. There's no limit to the submission required. What's next, nude photos attached to resumes? Showing up for the interview blindfolded?
Also, to translate, "prefer" means "demand." Seriously.
Will Consider: Associate's degree, High School diploma or GED with at least 2 years of human service experience. Strong Interpersonal, Problem-solving, and Organization skills. Demonstrate respect for the rights and abilities of people with disabilities. Valid driver's license, good driving record and own vehicle. Prefer also: Clubhouse model, Vocational/Training Program,.
The bachelors degree: the biggest screw-job in the history of time. Note how they seem to equate a bachelors degree and two years experience with an ASSOCIATES degree with two years of experience? Bachelors degrees take a LONG time to get and NO ONE cares that you have one. They want to see experience in the exact job, no matter what degree you have. But hey, go waste four years of your life anyway because the high school guidance counselor SAID so.
Local travel required; Program and variable environments; Some weekend and Holiday hours; Shared/common work space; Work in teams, groups, and 1:1...Strong adaptability, sense of responsibility and initiative, problem solving and teamwork skills. Strong computer skills. Bi-lingual in Spanish/Engliah strongly encouraged to apply.
It's a crap job alright. Weekend and holiday hours? Shared work space? Travel? Seriously, what the hell? Also: check the typo in "English." You should definitely look for someone with strong "Engliah" skills! Yeah!
$11.12 / Hour
Well thank god they'll only consider someone with internship experience, lest they waste eleven whole dollars on their labor!
Hours are flexible...Work directly with and alongside adults with mental illness engaging them in various tasks and activities to build their skills and confidence, and prepare them for employment. Coordinate a unit of activity within the program working hands-on. Serve as site manager for assigned external job sites, including learning the job, providing on-the-job training and support, and working effectively with the employer to maintain the job site. Serve as a non-clinical advisor to a caseload of members...
This is another one of those nebulous "human services" agencies that seems to have a strong presence in the valley. I guess people here go crazy a lot. Is it pollution? The abundance of college campuses? The shitty job prospects?
Okay, let's say you're young. You're still idealistic, you still think you can make a difference. You're willing to take a tough job. But will they take you?
Prefer: Bachelor's degree in a related field with internship experience or 2 years of mental health experience
They've done it, they've put it out in the open. They want a candidate with internship experience. They demand that you have already whored yourself out for free-- AFTER getting a bachelors degree in the field. There's no limit to the submission required. What's next, nude photos attached to resumes? Showing up for the interview blindfolded?
Also, to translate, "prefer" means "demand." Seriously.
Will Consider: Associate's degree, High School diploma or GED with at least 2 years of human service experience. Strong Interpersonal, Problem-solving, and Organization skills. Demonstrate respect for the rights and abilities of people with disabilities. Valid driver's license, good driving record and own vehicle. Prefer also: Clubhouse model, Vocational/Training Program,.
The bachelors degree: the biggest screw-job in the history of time. Note how they seem to equate a bachelors degree and two years experience with an ASSOCIATES degree with two years of experience? Bachelors degrees take a LONG time to get and NO ONE cares that you have one. They want to see experience in the exact job, no matter what degree you have. But hey, go waste four years of your life anyway because the high school guidance counselor SAID so.
Local travel required; Program and variable environments; Some weekend and Holiday hours; Shared/common work space; Work in teams, groups, and 1:1...Strong adaptability, sense of responsibility and initiative, problem solving and teamwork skills. Strong computer skills. Bi-lingual in Spanish/Engliah strongly encouraged to apply.
It's a crap job alright. Weekend and holiday hours? Shared work space? Travel? Seriously, what the hell? Also: check the typo in "English." You should definitely look for someone with strong "Engliah" skills! Yeah!
$11.12 / Hour
Well thank god they'll only consider someone with internship experience, lest they waste eleven whole dollars on their labor!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Part-time: What Does the Valley Offer?
If you are in the relatively privileged position of not being 100% unemployed, you may be on the quest for some supplemental income. Sucks to be you, because part-time jobs in the Valley are among the most outrageously exploitative you can find. Is it the dearth of college students? Class disparity? Are we actually living in pre-revolutionary France and we just don't know it?
Building Attendant Job Opening
Job Location: ------
Position: Part Time, Long Term
Hours: Rotating Weekly Schedule
Okay, kids, pull out your pencils and start filling in the job exploitation scantron test.
Part-time long-term: You can mark this one as "Exceeds Expectations" on your test. Why? Part-time work will always have turnover. This is because people work full-time. Houses and apartments cost full-time money.
But this annoys the exploitative employer. They want to hire someone so beaten down by the system that they have given up completely on full-time employment. They do not want to hire a janitor who is in law school. They want to hire someone who is tied to the geographical area by family or other responsibilities and will be stuck in the job forever.
Next question; rotating weekly schedule. This one little detail controls nearly every aspect of their underpaid part-time worker's life. Want to get another job? It'll have to work around your existing schedule, which you don't even get to know! Have plans for the weekend after next? Oops, you just got the schedule and you have to work. Guess you'll have to learn to stop making any plans for the future. Fill in "Exceeds Expectations" for this one as well!
Pay Rate:
Weekdays - $30.00/night
Weekends - $50.00/day
Call-ins for emergencies: $10 (or $10/hour, whichever is greater)
Of course this is an area where many middle class families would consider the above "salary" to be an acceptable budget for calling out for pizza and not the total daily pay for a part-time job. Fill in "Meets expectations" on your exploitation scantron!
Job Description:
Building Attendant
Walk-Through Hours:
Monday – Friday: 10pm
Saturday & Sunday: 8am & 10pm
OK, these are crappy hours to be driving somewhere to a part-time job. But, hours aren't everything; there are plenty of decent jobs with long or early hours. However...
On-Call Hours:
Monday – Friday: 4:30pm – 8am
Okay, what?
Saturday & Sunday: 24 hours/day
Okay, this is officially the cheapest beg for a property manager I've ever seen. They want someone to be on call all night and all weekend and pay them nothing for the on-call time?
But I'm sure they won't expect knowledge or abilities, right? Any warm body should do...
General:
Basic knowledge of building systems: sprinkler, electrical, boilers, air handlers, air conditioners, chillers.
Okay, so they want a mechanic/technician...
Walk-Through Duties:
Write reports of daily activities, irregularities, or property damage, theft, presence of unauthorized persons, or unusual occurrences.
Inspect security systems and equipment to ensure operational use and to detect evidence of tampering.
And a retired cop.
Monitor and adjust controls that regulate building systems, such as air conditioning and boilers. Respond to alarms and investigate disturbances. Call police or fire department in the event of an emergency (fire, unauthorized persons).
and an HVAC dude.
Empty trash on the 4th floor and in the basement on weekends.
and a mother.
Some overnight and coordination of snow removal in the winter months (weekends).
and someone to pay attention to the weather.
On-Call Maintenance Duties:
Water leaks
No heat/air conditioning
Gas smells
No water or hot water
Appliance problems (refrigerator, dishwasher, garbage disposal, stove/oven)
Electricity
Plumbing problems
Elevator
and, last but not least, someone qualified to investigate "gas smells."
Some holidays will require a morning and evening walk-thru when the ----- Main Office is closed in observance of the holiday.
Merry Christmas!
Building Attendant Job Opening
Job Location: ------
Position: Part Time, Long Term
Hours: Rotating Weekly Schedule
Okay, kids, pull out your pencils and start filling in the job exploitation scantron test.
Part-time long-term: You can mark this one as "Exceeds Expectations" on your test. Why? Part-time work will always have turnover. This is because people work full-time. Houses and apartments cost full-time money.
But this annoys the exploitative employer. They want to hire someone so beaten down by the system that they have given up completely on full-time employment. They do not want to hire a janitor who is in law school. They want to hire someone who is tied to the geographical area by family or other responsibilities and will be stuck in the job forever.
Next question; rotating weekly schedule. This one little detail controls nearly every aspect of their underpaid part-time worker's life. Want to get another job? It'll have to work around your existing schedule, which you don't even get to know! Have plans for the weekend after next? Oops, you just got the schedule and you have to work. Guess you'll have to learn to stop making any plans for the future. Fill in "Exceeds Expectations" for this one as well!
Pay Rate:
Weekdays - $30.00/night
Weekends - $50.00/day
Call-ins for emergencies: $10 (or $10/hour, whichever is greater)
Of course this is an area where many middle class families would consider the above "salary" to be an acceptable budget for calling out for pizza and not the total daily pay for a part-time job. Fill in "Meets expectations" on your exploitation scantron!
Job Description:
Building Attendant
Walk-Through Hours:
Monday – Friday: 10pm
Saturday & Sunday: 8am & 10pm
OK, these are crappy hours to be driving somewhere to a part-time job. But, hours aren't everything; there are plenty of decent jobs with long or early hours. However...
On-Call Hours:
Monday – Friday: 4:30pm – 8am
Okay, what?
Saturday & Sunday: 24 hours/day
Okay, this is officially the cheapest beg for a property manager I've ever seen. They want someone to be on call all night and all weekend and pay them nothing for the on-call time?
But I'm sure they won't expect knowledge or abilities, right? Any warm body should do...
General:
Basic knowledge of building systems: sprinkler, electrical, boilers, air handlers, air conditioners, chillers.
Okay, so they want a mechanic/technician...
Walk-Through Duties:
Write reports of daily activities, irregularities, or property damage, theft, presence of unauthorized persons, or unusual occurrences.
Inspect security systems and equipment to ensure operational use and to detect evidence of tampering.
And a retired cop.
Monitor and adjust controls that regulate building systems, such as air conditioning and boilers. Respond to alarms and investigate disturbances. Call police or fire department in the event of an emergency (fire, unauthorized persons).
and an HVAC dude.
Empty trash on the 4th floor and in the basement on weekends.
and a mother.
Some overnight and coordination of snow removal in the winter months (weekends).
and someone to pay attention to the weather.
On-Call Maintenance Duties:
Water leaks
No heat/air conditioning
Gas smells
No water or hot water
Appliance problems (refrigerator, dishwasher, garbage disposal, stove/oven)
Electricity
Plumbing problems
Elevator
and, last but not least, someone qualified to investigate "gas smells."
Some holidays will require a morning and evening walk-thru when the ----- Main Office is closed in observance of the holiday.
Merry Christmas!
Monday, December 1, 2008
Why Getting a Masters Won't Help
Check this crap job ad and feel free to use it in your semi-annual explanation of why you are not in graduate school.
ADMISSIONS COUNSELOR
DEPARTMENT OF ENROLLMENT SERVICES
KEY DUTIES:
• Meets individual enrollment goals.
• Conducts internet research to identify prospective communities & organizations for collaboration.
• Networks with organizations, agencies, schools and businesses to set-up information sessions.
• Conducts community outreaches and information sessions.
• Interviews prospective students.
• Directs new students through the enrollment process.
• Establishes and maintains relationships with outreach contacts.
• Works collaboratively with team members and faculty.
• Related duties as required.
Okay, aside from the obvious ethical issues of taking money from naive and not-yet-bitter college students, how difficult is this job? The usual office software, some butt-kissing, putting up with office politics...nothing someone with lowered expectations and a pair of heels couldn't handle.
QUALIFICATIONS:
Bachelor's degree required, Master’s Degree preferred; Minimum 3 years of successful college or university admissions, recruiting, or sales experience strongly desired;
Okay, this is a total pet peeve of mine. Take a gander at the type of experience required; three years and although it is specific, the fields listed are clearly disparate and unrelated. I guess they need someone extra knowledgable in...sales OR higher ed. Either one! Doesn't matter, just as long as it's something we listed!
Argh, if I had a nickel for every want ad I've seen that has insanely unrelated degrees or fields combined with a slash, I wouldn't need to be searching the want ads. I've seen ads for desk jobs that requested a degree in sociology, psychology, or communications, but wouldn't consider a resume of someone with a liberal arts, political science, or public policy degree. Why? Why make these bizarro, almost open-minded (for HR), connections between fields and degrees and yet STILL have the same idiotic "simon says" exclusionary bullshit that marks the whole of the job market. Why?!
Excellent oral, presentation and written communications skills required;
Microsoft should start including this phrase as part of a job ad template. It could come with typos, disturbingly low salary range listed as an hourly rate, and the phrase "masters degree preferred." Then HR really wouldn't have anything to do.
Strong computer skills required as well as extensive experience with Microsoft Office and database software; Ability to quickly adapt to new computer programs required; Valid driver's license and access to a vehicle required; Must work effectively as a team member, with a strong customer service orientation; Experience working with and for diverse communities or organizations; Experience working with an adult population desired.
Compensation: $35,000 - $40,000
Note to newly minted residents: this is the salary a masters degree will get you. And you have to work in Admissions. Ew.
ADMISSIONS COUNSELOR
DEPARTMENT OF ENROLLMENT SERVICES
KEY DUTIES:
• Meets individual enrollment goals.
• Conducts internet research to identify prospective communities & organizations for collaboration.
• Networks with organizations, agencies, schools and businesses to set-up information sessions.
• Conducts community outreaches and information sessions.
• Interviews prospective students.
• Directs new students through the enrollment process.
• Establishes and maintains relationships with outreach contacts.
• Works collaboratively with team members and faculty.
• Related duties as required.
Okay, aside from the obvious ethical issues of taking money from naive and not-yet-bitter college students, how difficult is this job? The usual office software, some butt-kissing, putting up with office politics...nothing someone with lowered expectations and a pair of heels couldn't handle.
QUALIFICATIONS:
Bachelor's degree required, Master’s Degree preferred; Minimum 3 years of successful college or university admissions, recruiting, or sales experience strongly desired;
Okay, this is a total pet peeve of mine. Take a gander at the type of experience required; three years and although it is specific, the fields listed are clearly disparate and unrelated. I guess they need someone extra knowledgable in...sales OR higher ed. Either one! Doesn't matter, just as long as it's something we listed!
Argh, if I had a nickel for every want ad I've seen that has insanely unrelated degrees or fields combined with a slash, I wouldn't need to be searching the want ads. I've seen ads for desk jobs that requested a degree in sociology, psychology, or communications, but wouldn't consider a resume of someone with a liberal arts, political science, or public policy degree. Why? Why make these bizarro, almost open-minded (for HR), connections between fields and degrees and yet STILL have the same idiotic "simon says" exclusionary bullshit that marks the whole of the job market. Why?!
Excellent oral, presentation and written communications skills required;
Microsoft should start including this phrase as part of a job ad template. It could come with typos, disturbingly low salary range listed as an hourly rate, and the phrase "masters degree preferred." Then HR really wouldn't have anything to do.
Strong computer skills required as well as extensive experience with Microsoft Office and database software; Ability to quickly adapt to new computer programs required; Valid driver's license and access to a vehicle required; Must work effectively as a team member, with a strong customer service orientation; Experience working with and for diverse communities or organizations; Experience working with an adult population desired.
Compensation: $35,000 - $40,000
Note to newly minted residents: this is the salary a masters degree will get you. And you have to work in Admissions. Ew.
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